love...

he's mine. and i'm happy about that. i love him. i just can't deal with this. i can't deal with him thinking i'm not happy. i AM. i'm just *always* sick. I can't stand him thinking it's *his* fault that I'm upset, yet I don't want to confide in him anymore. He gets upset and I don't like him being upset. I just can't do this. I can't.

everything i do
i do it for you

I just want him to know that I hate the way things are. I'm scared they won't change. I'm scared that it just won't matter if I keep trying. Part of me still thinks I should walk away...part of me thinks that I should leave because things haven't been fun for awhile.

I want him to know that I live for him. I want him to know that I am absolutely love him. I want him to know that he makes me happy; but the rest of my life does not. It's not his fault. It's mine. and i hate it. more than anything...